they always say be who you realy are,
but who realy am I?
am I someone?
am I alive?
all I feel is pain,sadness,and lonlieness
why am I so wierd and different?
what is normal?
what is it like to be normal?
they say listen to your heart,
were is my heart?
do I have a heart?

the darkness inside me is horribly threating. it screams for out, it causes my scars. people say i have no pain. i do but i cant explain. this misery inside me, its like an awful curse. i may not have a horrible life but somehow I’m ready to burst. my life is good my dad sometimes ignores me, but thats not much to say for a boy in a middle class family. some are abused, some have deaths hanging over them. however i don’t, yes i can be ignored, i can be made fun of by my own family, and yes i have been bullied. but its not much to say, i cant explain that darkness inside me, or why it screams for a outburst of blind cutting. yes i slit my arms and have nothing to show for it but scars. its a useless attempt to to sooth that darkness. yet still it screams, I’m like a bomb ready to burst, a boy who to young to have this curse. people laugh at these feelings,as if a boy my age is innocent, they laugh when they are not knowing of that darkness. they laugh when the are filled with a fake light, a light stabilized by the misery of the miserable. like i said i cant explain, this may not be like a the poem that i have previously written, it may just be words to you, it may be a meaningless paragraph that a falsely troubled boy has written, it may be a writing to long for you too bare. i doubt anybody cares to read this, but i write to seize that darkness in me and not always does it come as a poetic master piece, and so i write this in hope that someone can comprehend and relate too these feeling, i write to silence that darkness.

Alone. She couldn’t feel anything anymore. There’s a big whole where her heart should have been, She tried to fill it with hundreds of different things every day, but nothing worked. The empy-ness that enveloped her was intoxicating…making it hard to breath, but no one would accept her.

She couldn’t feel pain. Her eyes clouded over. She would just suddenly stop moving, stop breathing, she would close her confused eyes and scream as the darkness warped her. She would loose every sense of herself, forget who she was. She would let go of reality. No one could help her. No one would help her.

My heart is broken
Shattered into many pieces
like a glass mirror
My soul dies
It will never rest in peace
My tears cries
falling down through my cheeks
I see my dark clouds above me
My smile went away
The Pain is killing me
I watch my blood drip down
through my wrist and my hand
I’m sitting alone in the darkside
I’m nowhere to be found



Tears burn my eyes as i start to cry,
i now realize that everything was lie,
you were a lie nothing was ever a reality,
everything was just a dream,
guess living in the moment doesnt exsist,
you and me dont exsist,
from hear on out i know not to trust you,
i know not to trust anyone like you,
i know that forever doesnt exsist,
i know it was just a myth,
made up to comfort people,
cuz’ the fact of the matter is there is always a end,
a end to everything,
and to life…..